The magnificent blue and gold macaw (ara ararauna) you see here actually works for Macaw Publishing. Her name is Sunshine. We're training her to answer the phone when telemarketers call. She can produce a quite credible "Hello" when the phone rings, but the conversation sort of disintegrates after that, which is just fine with us. (What did we do before Caller ID?) Her record for keeping someone on the line is two minutes forty-seven seconds.

Sunshine is only five years old. Macaws live human life spans, so she's likely to be around long after we're all gone. She has an amazingly sweet disposition, especially in light of the fact that she survived living with what just had to be a dysfunctional family. Parrots don't make stuff up. They repeat what they hear. When Sunshine came to Macaw Publishing as a four-year-old, her favorite expressions were "Shut up!" "Stop it!" and "Ouch!" Now she says things like "Hello" "Cracker" and "Pretty Bird," so we're making some progress. The soliloquy from Hamlet is just going to take a little longer.

Blue and gold macaws are native to much of the northern portion of South America. They are also found in Central America from Panama to Columbia. As you can see from the picture, and as the name suggests, they have blue backs and wings with chest and leg feathers of golden yellowish- orange. Black plumage surrounds the lower part of the face and beak. The face is mainly bare white skin, with tufts of small black feathers arranged in a distinct pattern that is as different for each bird as fingerprints are for human beings. When they become agitated or excited, blue and gold macaws actually blush, their white faces turning pink with blood flowing to capillaries in the skin. We don't know what happens when they become embarrassed, and we respect Sunshine too much to find out. You won't catch us dressing her up in a sweater or subjecting her to any of the other humiliating things owners of little yappy dogs are known to do to their pets.